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Brian,
There's something i'd always wanted to say, but never found the words; I hope this makes up for it.
Walking out of school last friday morning after what you said, was one of the saddest things i've ever done. I really love you and I guess i've been avoiding the reality of saying goodbye.
First of all, I want you to know, that no matter how the future between us ends, I will NEVER, under any circumstance, be able to forget any second of any moment we've ever had together. NEVER on any planet in this universe will anyone or anything ever make me forget the past year we've spent together. No one can take the place you have in my heart.
Second, I don't want you to worry about any argument we've ever had, good or bad, old as time, or as recent as yesterday. I know out differences in Ellen's drama this week was scary especially since we didn't really work it out, and we kind of saw ourselves in that situation, but - i'm confident in the person I love; the person you are. I doubt, even though sometimes I regret saying things like this, that i've ever made a better choice in my entire lifetime.
Third, i've never really been able to tell you how much I love you, but when I walked out of school that morning, I knew exactly what to say; Not that I love you more than your arms are wide or mine are short, or more than the sky or the universe is wide - I do love you that much, but that when i'm at Carolina next year, the thing i'll miss and regret the most is not being able to spend every moment in your arms. Next to the time I had to write about why I needed my dad, i've never had such a painful experience than writing this. I hope if anything does ever happen, you look back and read this.
The last thing I want to say is this: just don't WORRY because in God's plan, things always tend to work out for the best. Sometimes you have to lose things to understand what they truly mean. That's how I knew I loved you; because you said before that you didn't want to lose the friendship we had because you liked me because you knew how important that was to me - that's really why I said yes. I'll miss every moment of it, but i'm not worried about either of us fighting or meeting new people - because no matter what, things always work out for the best.
I will truly miss you and all the crazy things you do, but you know what Brian? Now, when I look at you, or our pictures, I won't cry because it's over or because the moment passed ....
i'll smile because they happened ..... with you.
Always and forever,
Rachel
~ True love waits, and so will I. Not one day will go by that I won't think of you. | | |
| the world is coming to an end I swear. There's always so much to do, and so much you wish you COULD do instead. Graduation is less than a month away, Senior Project less than twenty days, and Prom less than a week, and all I can think about is how much time I HAVEN'T spent with you guys. I'm really going to miss you all next year, and there will be days that i'll think about you and wish i'd done more. Especially to certain lil filipino ppl that come and go in and out of my life. If you guys aren't going to prom you should reconsider. Even though it's something i'm dreading. You should go this is for all the people out there like *cough cough Ellen cough* who find other things more important. Memories are something people can't take from you and that's what high school's for. Making memories that last a lifetime. | | |
| Hey guys
What's up? I got a couple things to talk about. First things first: Schedule:
AP Gov't (Evans) *sigh* first period with Brian ... start praying
H Calculus (Greeson) started praying yet?
AP Chemistry (Whitaker) yay Ellen's in my class and lunch!
H Marine (Gullickson) Oh no ... a class with lil kuya ... imma have to die
H Vocal Ensemble (Halvorsen) Yay time with Kelly
AP Chemisttry (Whitaker) Class with Ellen!
AP English 12 (Davis?) Who's in this class?? Amanda?
AP Stats (Parker) *not another class with BRian
Sigh ... speaking of Brian ... I have recently been informed that tomorrow we will have been going out for a month ... lol and u know what he wants to do?? lol u guys are gonna like this one .... watch our volleyball practice ... yea fun stuff.
Last thing on the list. All you seniors class of '06 let me know if you wanna do shirts with every1 Lse ... honestly ... i'd rather do them on my own with you guys give me a ring (491-3698) <3 Rachel | | |
| It's the middle of the summer, so I guess it's time for me to start blogging again. LoL Don't get TOO excited Krystal. There are just some moments that you get to enjoy, and that lightning storm last nite was one of them. I guess most of you guys know already, but if you don't ... me and Brian are going out ... since last Friday. It's a pretty funny story if you want to know the truth. We went to the park - we do that sometimes, just to think or just to get the chance to sit in front of a lake. Brian almost killed himself choking on a tic tac. LoL My boyfriend is a dork. Well it's partly because I pushed him. We sat there and talked for a while, and for those of you that don't already know THIS, Leslee and Polo are going out also. Then me and Brian sat there for a while, and he got tired of all the people on the train waving at him, so he decided we were going to go on the train, so we sat there on the bench for a while and talked about things, then he pushed me, and he was like "oh i'm sorry" and I was like .. ure mean and I pushed him back. LoL then he was like .. I did that to Ellen one time and she fell over, and I pushed him back and was like ... that's for pushing Ellen. LoL Ellen I miss you!!! LoL Ellen's so funny ... she's a little bit more outgoing now since she's been at governor's school most of the summer. When we were talking one nite, she was like ... goodness Rachel, do you want me to call Brian and yell at him for you? LoL She did. You know, having a boyfriend is nice and all, but I miss you guys too. After we went to the park, we were going to go see a movie, but we were early so we sat in the car and did what we usually do, and talk about what it would be like if we went out, and he told me that he wasn't going to be afraid anymore, and that he didn't want to have a 'R' for regret on his head for the rest of his life for not doing something he wanted to, and of course, my lil kuya, Polo, who has the worst timing ever with me called just then. LoL and u wanna know what he said? "Rachel what are you doing?" "I'm going to see a movie with BRIAN, Polo" and since Polo's been trying to get me and Brian together for a while, he was like .. oh BRIAN'S there, give him the phone. LoL and he goes ... "Brian," and Brian's got this look on his face, then Polo finishes, and he's like "look in the mirror, I think you have lipstick on your face." LoL So then Brian hangs up on him, and Polo calls back, so since Polo ruined that moment, I guess we decided to go see the movie, we got inside the movie theatre, and we were sitting there like ... I better turn off my phone in case Polo calls again, and Brian takes my phone, and turns it off. LoL Yes, I know ... my boyfriend is a dork. We went to see the dumbest movie of all time - war of the worlds, the movie Leslee and Polo saw b4 Polo asked her out coincidently. It was funny coz the movie was so stupid. LoL there was this one part that was pretty scary and me and Brian thought that one of the main ppl would die - there's way too many twists in the movie, and so the aliens were about to take over the boat, and they were in the water, then the people fell in the water, and I was like ... if I were them, I would sit there and cry, and Brian's starts laughing at me, and I was like ... ok Brian, if you think that's so funny, what would YOU do? and he was like .. LoL i'd sit there and cry, and it went on like that throughout most of the movie, until 15 minutes before it was over, I was like ... this is a stupid movie, we should just walk out, and Brian was like .. do you want to? We were about to, but we didn't since Leslee told me the ending was good. It was terrible just to let you know. Don't ever see it, so then me and Brian are leaving the movie theatre and about to pick up Leslee from work - late of course. So i'm stressing out about how i'm a terrible big sister because I didn't pick her up on time, tho I did tell her we'd be late, and then Brian's like ... it's ok Rachel .. calm down ... so we're driving down Wendover about to pass the Guilford College Rd. exit, and he's like ... so ... what would you say if I asked you out? and at first I was like ... so is he asked me out, or what I would say if, but since we took long enough to decide that, I decided he was asking me out. LoL the first thing he said after I said I would say yes, was ... lol what do I do now? LoL and I just laughed at him, and he was like .. what? and I was like ... we watch the dumbest movie ever, and then you ask me out. And we couldn't stop laughing. Then when we picked up Leslee we had to try relaly hard not to laugh, and Brian was like ... no if we don't tell Polo I won't be able to sleep tonite. LoL so he told Polo, which was a GIGANTIC mistake, lol since Polo's always the one that messes everything up! LoL j/k Polo. TTYL8er
<3 Rachel | | |
| Hey guyz!
Long time no blog. Yea I know .. being a student is hard. Leslee clicked on Polo's xanga today and that's when I realized ... I haven't blogged in like oh 3 months. LoL I didn't even write about our wonderful trip to NJ ... or maybe I did. Bretster what are you doing up there? I'm sorri if Alexa's driving you crazy. LoL j/k Neway I had a pretty good party on my birthday over Spring Break. Kelly's mom took us to Margaritaville for dinner one night ... man it was cold. And no Polo ... we're not old enough to be drinking margaritas, but we still had a great time. Krsystal needs to show me how to put those pictures on here, so you guys can see all the fun we had. I woke them up at like 7am (yes, on Spring Break) because it was SUNNY! BRIGHT AND SUNNY. It rained about half the time we were there, but we still managed to get wet. Aha Kelly - I got that one on tape! And it's funny how Kelly was telling me she was sitting in class wondering if they were gonna play the electric slide at prom this weekend. LoL NEway ... back to my party. It was a pretty good party for a 17 yr old. At least it wasn't like a 5 year old's party *cough filipino ppl cough - not you polo* though Brian did try to make fun of our so called "traditional filipino family pictures" on our stairwell. It was great ... Cept there were too many people. Brian got KILLED aaahhhhhhhaaa. If I can figure out how .. believe me ... i'll put that picture on here, but I guess he got me back for it later coz he was insane all through that movie. I SO should have sat next to John. STILL it was a hilraoius movie ... Krystal missed the party!!! and Matt and Polo missed the movie! lol Would have been hilaroius to see Polo beat up Brian with all the things he had to say about him during the movie. Bret ... make sure when Leslee and Alexa are together again they don't play that who's in the bathroom game. Ahhhaaa. Can't wait to see you guyz again this summer!
<3 Rachel | | |
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